In Keith Bybees How Civility Works, he notes that feminists, Black Lives Matter protesters and anti-war protesters have been asked to « calm down and try to be more polite. » He argues that Tone Policing is a way to divert attention from injustice and move the problem in the style of the complaint rather than addressing the complaint itself.  In his letter from a Birmingham prison, the Reverend Martin Luther King Jr. condemned this type of silence and wrote that he was « gravely disappointed » by the « white moderate more attached to order » than to justice.  This is a superior form of addressing the very flesh of the argument. In this form of disagreement, you offer an opposing case, but very little evidence. You just say what you believe to be true, unlike the position of the person you`re arguing with. M. Graham gives this example: John Pope (L) expresses his disagreement with supporters of President Donald Trump near President Trump`s Mar-a-Lago station on March 4, 2017 in West Palm Beach, Florida. President Trump spent part of the weekend in the house. (Photo by Joe Raedle/Getty Images) Tone Policing (including tone-trolling, tone argument, and sound error) is an ad-hominem (personal attack) and anti-debate tactic that is based on criticizing a person for expressing emotions. Tone Policing diverts attention from the validity of a statement by attacking the tone in which it was presented, not the message itself.
 Dubbed the « hacker philosopher » by tech journalist Steven Levy, Graham wrote on a number of topics on his blog popular with paulgraham.com, which received 34 million page views in 2015. My father told me, « Just because it`s black doesn`t mean you have to say that. » You can always say, « It`s not white! » So you can try: « I`m not sure it`s a good idea » (not « It`s a horrible idea! ») or « I`m not sure I can agree » (NOT « I don`t agree with you! ») or how about the words I learned from my father: « I find it hard, to believe it. » As they say, it is often more important to us than what is said. This is true when we put our feelings above logic.